What a journey it has been since I have gotten home from Guatemala a few months ago. That trip has shaped the way I look at a lot of things in life. It has done so in various ways. Just for a quick update, I recently got out of the hospital once again. This was a hard and very stressful stay. I made it out alive though and that only makes me stronger, right?
More recently, I’ve been struggling with an avid number of people who feel they understand what I’m going through or know how to fix it. Also, I’ve heard a lot of people judge me or worse yet, give up on me. I’ve lost a lot of hope in the human race as a whole… and people wonder why I’ve tried to take my life…
I’ve given it a lot of thought and I have decided I’m going to move in a new direction in life. I’ve decided I need to start focusing on me and what’s best for my life. Right now, that includes cutting back on church and other religious activities. I have found religion to only bring me more judgement and pain than any other thing in my life. It may be hard for a lot of you to understand, but most Christians, just don’t get depression. This has caused me a lot of pain and inner turmoil.
I am thankful, however, for those who have stuck by me through my toughest times. My parents, brother, sister in law, and a very select few friends have been such an awesome support system for me.
I’m currently working at Brookcrest nursing home and still plan on attending Cornerstone in the fall. I will keep you all updated if things change, however.
I hope this update reaches you well.